Five ways to ensure your random group hates you, and seven ways to ensure they don’t

WoW’s random dungeon system brought a lot of great things with it; most importantly, the ability to quickly gain experience points while obtaining valuable and powerful gear at lower levels, and the ability to gain Frost and Triumph emblems at higher levels. Despite these wonderful things, the random dungeon system has also caused a lot of grief and cross-server hatred. As a random dungeon aficionado, I’ve compiled a list of things to do to get your group to hate you and things to do in order to ensure a smooth and painless run.

To get your group to hate you:

1) Ninja loot

So you’re a warrior, but a green cloth caster robe comes up to be rolled on? And it’s worth four gold? Need that thing! Not that it matters that it would be a huge upgrade for the poor healer – who is constantly running out of mana – you need exactly four gold to buy your riding training (at least, that’s what you’ll tell your group members). WoW has solved many of the ninja-ing issues by only allowing certain classes to Need role on blue (Superior) and purple (Epic) items (ie: only Plate-wearers can Need Plate items), but it can still happen with green items, unfortunately.

2) “Discover” the emotes

I once had the privilege of grouping with a young Tauren hunter who thought he’d lighten the mood by spamming the /moo button. He didn’t. I’m pretty sure that if Blizzard invents a way to physically slap people cross-server, this hunter will be the first target. Anyway, don’t spam emotes – it’s never funny, especially when you...

3) “Discover” the emotes mid-boss fight

This happened too. For the love of Thrall, please don’t do that, either.

4) Post your Bejeweled/Peggle achievements to the party

Once, during an ICC run, a healer in our raid was apparently kicking serious ass at Bejeweled...at the expense of the raid. It was infuriating during a raid, and it is just as infuriating in a random dungeon. If you don’t have the attention span to properly run through a dungeon (most of which can be done in 20 minutes or so), then don’t queue. “But Erikaaaa,” I can hear you whining, “We have randoms on faaaaarm now.” I don’t care, young WoW player, other people are focusing, so you should too.

5) Be a jerk to new players

You’re so 1337, and this group is just full of n00bs. You could probably one-man it, but you want to get through it quickly and it takes longer alone, so you deign to play with idiots. Your life must be so hard, being so much better than everyone else. Were you just born good, or did you ever have to actually take the time to learn your class, like the rest of us do? I bet it was the latter, and that’s what many people who queue for dungeons are trying to do. Being a jerk to people who are still learning does not make you look cool or skilled; it makes you look like a jerk. It’s also a huge waste of time – I’ve been in random groups where one player was so busy berating another, we could have finished the instance twice in the time it took to do it once.

On the other hand, if you want to ensure a smooth and painless dungeon:

1) Be friendly

I always say hi to the group, even if I’m joining mid-dungeon. I say hi when a new player joins the group. I just try and keep things nice and light. If we’re all friendly with each other from the start, then I find that people are less likely to be rude when/if the tank/healer/DPS isn't so great, and more likely to be polite about it and offer advice. By a similar token...

2) Be respectful

I know this is similar to the first point, but I feel as though it really needs a separate section, because people tend to forget that one of the things that can be most wonderful (or most disastrous) about the random dungeon system is the huge mix of people that you could get grouped with. You could have a veteran player making her tenth alt, someone trying a new class for the first time, and someone who is totally new to the game. Not everyone knows every fight perfectly, and sometimes people are still learning. I absolutely hate it when I see someone picking on a newer player just because they don’t know exactly what they’re supposed to be doing. That’s the whole point of the random system – to learn how to play your class! It’s important to keep this in mind to ensure a smooth run, but if it’s your first time through a particular dungeon...

3) Don’t be afraid to ask questions

Meaningful questions, not idiotic ones. What I mean is, if you don’t know the fights, then ask! There’s nothing more frustrating than wiping over and over on a boss, to all of a sudden see an “Ooooh, we’re supposed to be hiding behind the pillar,” appear above a player’s head. If you don’t know, ask – someone will be able to help you out.

4) Ready check

I’ve noticed that – especially in lower level dungeons – tanks sometimes have a tendency to just barrel through the run, pulling gigantic mob after gigantic mob, then making a beeline straight for the boss. Ready checks are important to ensure that everyone’s got mana, health, buffs and whatever else they need to perform their best. Four simple clicks: Enter > “r?” > Enter, and you’ve finished this step! It takes two seconds, and will virtually guarantee a smoother run.

5) Need when you actually do need

I know, it’s crazy, right? I generally take this as a rule of thumb – and I generally don’t ask if I can Need an item unless it’s for off-spec. I just find it kind of silly when a Warlock asks if he can Need a cloth caster item. In general, don’t ask unless it’s for off-spec (and make sure you actually do need it.)

6) If you can’t handle the heat, get out of the random

The queueing system is not perfect; sometimes players are not quite geared or skilled enough to handle a dungeon they are placed in. If the group is not getting anywhere, and you know it’s probably because you’re not quite up to snuff, it’s important to know that it’s okay to bow out. The group will probably appreciate it because it’s usually shorter – and much less frustrating – to requeue than to keep wiping over and over. Before you go, though...

7) Don’t leave without a goodbye

Just let your group members know that you have to go, either because something has come up IRL or because you don’t think you’re up to par for the dungeon. Leaving without a word is a bit rude and leaves people wondering why you left. You don’t have to give every detail, just let people know that you’re going. To keep things friendly at the end of a dungeon, I always say a thank you and a goodbye, and may even toss in a “Nice run”, if it was.

In short, every group is going to be different. If you’re running a quick random with a bunch of friends before it’s raiding time, then what’s acceptable is going to be different than if you’re running with four total strangers. In general, though, if you’re respectful and polite, chances are that the group will be a success.

Happy random-ing, everyone!